Abby's ramblings about this 'n that

The opinionated scuttlebutt has things to say

Existing in Relation to Others

“Why did you decide to become trans?”

If I had a dollar for every time I have been asked “Can I ask you a personal question” I would have enough to pay for a full month’s worth of transition care (and let me tell you, that shit is expensive).

published on May 16, 2022

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Sep 07, 2021

When I meet new people, they inevitably want to know what it's like to transition. That's hard to describe, but easy to show: just look at my eyes.

In Defense of Cleaning the Dirty Laundry

Aug 06, 2020

This piece was written in response to those who decry protesters as "provocateurs" and other names, and is an apology on behalf of those who do that work. (N.B., the definition of apology which means "a reasoned argument or writing in justification of something, typically a theory or religious doctrine."

No Identification without Representation!

Jun 29, 2020

I have a confession to make. I watched a steamy sex scene the other day and it got me worked up. So worked up, in fact, that it made me cry. Twice.

And that's why representation in TV and movies matters.

The existential crises of difference, privilege, and forks

Feb 18, 2020

A look into how we can talk about the struggles of people who lack privilege, and how autism fits in.

PSA: Misgendering and mis-naming

Oct 29, 2019

Uh oh! You slipped up and referred to someone with the wrong pronouns. Now what?

Being Vocally Supportive

Oct 22, 2019

As a trans ally, you may feel the urge to greet transgender people and let them know you support them. Don't.

PSA: Dogs in public spaces

Oct 18, 2019

An open letter to dog owners who take their dogs to human social events.

Things only a trans woman...

Jul 25, 2019

A follow-up to my last post, where I talk about things that are unique to trans women (i.e., things a cis woman wouldn't understand).

Surprising "woman things", one month in...

Jul 23, 2019

A bit of a random list of things that stuck out to me as I was learning how to dress like a woman (ergo, mostly apparel related).


Jul 01, 2019

De-closeting, with FAQ.